I Found Just The Right Stuff To Let Go Of

Before we set out on our recent trip to Portugal and Panama, I decided that I would “allow” this trip to be about my spiritual awakening.

I’ve long felt a bit lonely and disconnected from the “greater power” with only very tiny and passing glimpses into its presence and love.

I can maybe count exactly 2 times in my life where I really felt this presence. I’m 33. That’s a bit shyte. Sometimes I shake my fist at the sky in frustration at this cold shoulder I’ve been getting.

But of course, the problem is me. The problem is that I live in my head. I’m convinced that all solutions exist right here on earth. In my brain or in someone else’s.

I’m convinced that, even though there’s a higher power, it’s not its job to help me.

And, as anyone who is into this woo-woo stuff will tell you, it’s that very same conviction that leads me to not get that help.

I’m a control freak. Fuck letting go. That shit is for losers who don’t have their shit together.

Except they’re not losers. They’re winning. And I’m losing.

They’re calm and easy-going. I’m frantic and curled up into a tight mess of anxiety and the illusion of control.

They’re “happy” or, at least, more at peace than I am. While I sit here, cursing my damn computer for breaking. Cursing my damn car for breaking. And cursing every other damn fucking thing that’s not right in my life right now.

(SIDEBAR: Funny thing is that I like to proclaim that I’m NOT a victim. That I take responsibility for the stuff going in my life. That last paragraph sure paints a different picture. lolz)

So I’ve got this sort of spiritual coach helping me learn to be a little less tense and be a little more “let-go-y”.

And it’s been helping quite a bit. BUT… it’s like this… the more you let go of, the more you become aware of that needs letting go of.

When you’ve been ignoring all the problems in your life and been FORCING it to work out the way YOU think is best… well there’s a TON of shit to let go of then. And once you open those gates of flowiness-bullshit, then you realise that they’re floodgates and you’re fucked now.

So I sit here “letting go” of some of the obvious stuff. And it helps a little. But there are some things that I’m damn convinced I should be able to handle myself and I haven’t been letting go of those.

Today, I realised, that one of those things is this God-forsaken MacBook I’m typing on. My last one fizzled out about a week or 2 ago and I bought this one. This one’s being a pain in my ass too.

And I need stability for my work.

But here’s the thing: the more I try and fix it myself, the more it fucks out.

Whether that’s just reinstalling it over and over or replacing it with yet another pre-loved MacBook, it’s just not been working MY way.

And that’s when I realised that this is an area where I can let go of something. I can admit that my way isn’t working and just open myself to whatever the universe already knows to be a better solution.

If you think this is weird bullshit woo-woo stuff, how do you think I feel?!

It feels dumb to think that letting go of a problem will solve it. But I’m also just completely exhausted of forcing my own way on the problems around me.

So here you go, universe. Do what you want with this damn thing. If it means I need to change careers, I trust that will become clear in due course. If it means I need a brand spanking new MacBook, I’m sure you’ll make that obvious. And if it means I need to use some other God-awful operating system, well I’ll take that on the chin and move on.

How Technology Will Bring Utopia And We’ll Hate It

I don’t think we’re that far away from the kind of Utopia vs Dystopia you see in movies these days.

You know the ones… where there’s a planet or area where all the “haves” live and there’s a planet or area where all the “have nots” live.

And the “haves” really have it all. The cure to cancer, fancy communication devices (that may or may not be built in to their heads), pretty houses, gorgeous public areas to enjoy with their families, cars that drive themselves, or no need for cars at all, etc.

And, in these movies, the “have nots” have none of that and less. They normally live in very cramped, dirty, run-down areas. They don’t have the cure to cancer or any other disease and have to watch their loved ones die. They have to do physically intense work so that they don’t starve and normally work what you and I might consider “crazy” hours for sheer—and bare—survival.

I subscribe to Peter Diamandis’ “Abundance Insider” newsletter and every week I learn about some amazing new technologies that will supposedly bring us to a state of abundance. And I certainly see the potential for that abundance we all dream of.

I don’t think we’re too far from that at all. But…

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Time To Stab My Dreams In The Eye. Again.

Almost a year has passed since I threatened to “Murder Words”.

And I hate making idle threats.

It used to be a thing I was “known” for. I’d see people roll their eyes when I told them about my next “big idea”. And it hurt to see that.

So somewhere along the line, I decided to stop announcing my intentions and to just do big shit.

No warning. Just be awesome. Let them catch up.

And that’s kinda worked for me in some cases…

  • My client list reads like a who’s who of internet marketing.
  • I earn $200 an hour doing PHP programming. (But PHP is not really what I do. More on that later.)
  • I live in a house that probably costs 10x the one I grew up in, even when you account for inflation.
  • And in about 3 weeks, I’m moving to Portugal for a “working vacation”.

So yes, I’ve gotten it right in some cases.

But I’ve also gotten it wrong in some other cases…

  • I’ve barely written a single email or blog post in 6 or more months.
  • I haven’t bought the singing course I’ve wanted for the past 4+ years.
  • I go months at a time without picking up a guitar, despite calling myself a guitarist and a musician. Ha!
  • I’ve never learned a single new language despite starting more than 5.

Those are all “passions” of mine but I’ve let myself down on every single one.

Something gets in the way. Work gets busy. A project goes into “emergency mode”. And my dreams shatter.

And time passes. I look back and wonder what happened. I wonder why I can’t do anything I say I care about.

And my heart grows heavier. My breath strains. My shoulders drop.

And the cycle continues.

Well fuckit. I’m going to give this writing thing another stab.

I’m gonna give it all another stab.

And I’m gonna keep stabbing at these elusive little bastard-fucks that I call my dreams until my dagger lands in real “dream flesh” and draws real “dream blood”.

And then?

I’m gonna stab again. And again. And again. Until one day, I can look back and say that I did it all.

And I don’t care if it takes a million stabs. I’m gonna stab until the stabbing is done.

Norio “The Dream Stabber” De Sousa

PS: I said I don’t do PHP programming. So if I don’t do PHP programming, what do I do?

I solve problems. And if you’d like to earn $200 an hour doing work other people do for 10 bucks an hour then you’d better learn to solve problems too.

Jim Rohn said, “You don’t get paid for the hour. You get paid for the value you bring to the hour.”

You see, anyone can program PHP. But few PHP programmers are also internet marketers. And fewer still have run their own SaaS company, hosting company, affiliate campaigns, studied email copywriting and then went on to write over 100 of their own carefully crafted sales emails.

I have. And that means I bring very specific and rare value to the hour. So $200 is a bargain.

And it doesn’t matter if you live in the US, India or South Africa (like me)… If you can bring more value — or unique value — to the hours you work for your clients, you can charge more.

Comment below if you’d like to learn how I went from earning $50 an hour to earning $200 an hour (as a freelancer) in less than a year.


12 Weeks to the Life of My Dreams?

It’s here!

The beginning of my (third?) “12-Week Year” — a time when I make “New Year” resolutions and then give myself 12 weeks to achieve them in.

Learn more here: The 12 Week Year: Get More Done in 12 Weeks than Others Do in 12 Months

I did my planning this Saturday. I’m using WorkFlowy to manage my “year” this time because I already use it quite a lot already. This should help my 12WY execution be an “easy” habit to build & maintain.

The planning was emotional, overwhelming and confronting. There are so many things I would have hoped to have done by now that I haven’t and so many more things that I still want to do.

To bring that list down to “The Critical Few” was challenging but necessary.

I knew I needed to focus on what matters to me right now and that’s the travel. The escape from working for work’s sake. The transformation.

It’s overdue.

So I pared down my list to just 3 things:

  1. Make enough money every month to travel.
  2. Work max 2-4 hours a day. Explore the rest of the time.
  3. Get biz & personal accounting 100% updated and outsourced.

Items #1 and #2 are kinda easy. I just need to put out valuable content into key Facebook groups and work in a focused way. (Using brain.fm — lifesaver!)

#3 is slightly more difficult but absolutely necessary.

I’ll be doing the initial “catch up” bookkeeping myself using software my bank provides and, once that’s done, exporting the lot and sending it to my (old) bookkeeper to maintain.

I’ve kept this simple because otherwise, I might not do it.

I need this to work.

My life has been put on hold for far too long. It’s time to live.

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The 2 Most Important Steps for Success in Anything

Success is simple. Not easy. Hard, actually. But simple.

In my own experience, here’s what it takes:

  1. Be the best.
  2. Find a “sneezer”.

1. Becoming the best has nothing to do with actually being the best at something. It’s got to do with a philosophy of being the most committed to something.

If you get hired to mow a lawn, you’d better mow the fuck out of that lawn. Make sure that, even if it’s raining, the lawn is mown as perfectly as you can, given your resources and environment.

And if your resources are limited, work at improving them as fast as you can while still delivering at a very high commitment level.

I’ve got a confession to make…

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Dear Cows: Please Stop Hurting Me. Kthanksbye

In my late twenties, I thought I might be lactose intolerant. And, after a few weeks (or maybe months) of not having any dairy at all, I had a full-on cappuccino with cream. (It was delicious!)

I guess I was “testing” the theory. After all, I’d had many cappuccinos before without having any issues.


The funny thing about food intolerances is that you might not be aware that you have them. You could write off the bloat and cramping and other symptoms to any number of other things. And most people usually do.

But once you start purposely “experimenting” with a food intolerance, things become a whole lot clearer.

If you have a lactose intolerance, you can’t cut out dairy and then have dairy one day and not notice the difference.

Doesn’t work that way.

So that day, after paying our bill, I went straight from the restaurant to the loo and left my loving wife waiting in the mall for 45 minutes or more, I don’t recall, while I experienced horrible, torturous cramping and other “fun” lactose intolerance symptoms.

And today I might be setting myself up for much of the same.

Why? Continue reading

How To Work Less And Spend More Time at The Beach

I open my laptop to work. I’m in a beach-facing apartment at the coast. I can see the ocean in front of me. I want to sit on that beach. There’s nearly nothing else at all I want more.

Something interesting happens when you remove yourself from your normal work place. Or rather, something interesting happens when you surround yourself with better things to do than work.

You stop seeing your work as something valuable. You see it only as a means to an end. It becomes a way for you to “go to the beach.”

And when that happens, you might feel a pull towards outsourcing more of your work. Because if you don’t, then you’ll be stuck in the holiday apartment you’re renting while your friends go relax on the beach and play in the waves.

How miserable.

And you don’t want to be miserable, do you?

Of course not. No one wants to be miserable. We choose it by accident. We choose it because we fail to see the alternatives around us. But when those alternatives are staring you in the face… they become hard to ignore.

This experience taught me something.

And it’s a simple lesson but a powerful lesson. It could be a life-transforming lesson.

Here it is:

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From Murdering Tech to Murdering Words?

My name is Norio De Sousa and I’m a programmer known by my clients as “The Tech Assassin”.

I’ve been doing web programming work for over 16 years now which means that I’ve pretty much seen it all and know how to fix pretty much any problem.

Programming has been my bread and butter for years but, a few years ago, I started studying internet marketing.

And that’s when I realised that internet marketers were struggling to find decent programmers because programmers just don’t speak their language.

And that’s where I’m different…

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